New Blog title, new twist on life, becoming a NEW ME one step at a time...

Whoa... I don't even know where to start. I have thought about blogging my latest detour in my life this past month, but it wasn't until today that I realized that I need to document even the tiniest things, that that the little blessings in life are HUGE steps.

I NEED to look back on this and see progress, and I intend to see just that.

This blog used to be titled "RUNNING on the raw edge."... I changed the first word as I have learned that it isn't about running, it is about LIVING. I AM a runner, an athlete, but am also becoming a me I don't know yet. Right now I am not running at all... they tell me I will no longer be a runner - we'll see. In the meantime though...

A brief timeline since I got too busy 'running' and abandoned this blog...

• March 13, 2009 - minor surgery that put me on 'light duty' at the gym for 6 weeks. Recovery from that went well... I took some down time and traveled with some amazing friends and went SKYDIVING in San Marcos, TX which remains to this day probably the most thrilling activity I have ever done - and I look forward to the opportunity to do it again! I still stayed as active as I could and worked out regularly to the limits I was allowed. I am so grateful that I was able to experience that and some quality time w/ amazing friends before all this!
• April 20, 2009 - more traveling, came home from a 7 hour drive and injured my back bringing things in. Symptoms the next day resembled sciatica. That week was trips to the chiropractor and symptoms continued to get more concerning. Doc put me on bedrest and told me to go straight to ER with ANY changes. I was unable to walk from that day on for over 3 weeks.
• April 25, 2009. That's the day my life really changed. Ironically (and frustrating) it was the EXACT DAY I was allowed off 'light duty' at the gym and had planned on getting back to my hard core training schedule for my marathon. Prior to my surgery in March I was at the gym daily barring extreme circumstances either running or doing weight training with a trainer. Instead of going back to the gym, I was being admitted to the hospital with an acute case of DVT (Deep Vein Thrombosis). My entire left leg was full of blood clots from pelvis to ankle. I spent 5 days in the hospital in a whirlwind of IV's and pain meds and returned home w/ Lovenox injections and a plan of regular visits to the Coumadin clinic for the next 6 months where I get my blood taken and Coumadin levels adjusted to the 'theraputic' range.
• May 4, 2009. I received my handicap hanger for my car from the DMV complete w/ a registration with MY name on it. My doc had sent in a form. Looking at it I got angry and frustrated and cried... it felt like the state of Idaho was 'rubbing it in'... it has an expiration of Oct. 29, 2009. I don't intend to need to renew it.
• May 11, 2009. After being on bedrest the majority of the time and many setbacks I had been contacted by a surgeon the Friday prior. On Mon, May 11, I had a surgery that removed most of the clots from my knee to pelvis. They found my iliac vein in my pelvis was being crushed by an artery and they put a stent in, the surgery was to help prevent the long term damage of PTS (Post Thrombotic Syndrome) and help salvage the long term function of my leg. It was an outpatient surgery that I was AWAKE for ... watch the animation - yes, the wire tickled... and it HURT when they were working on my pelvis and inflating the balloons and putting the stent in.
• May 12, 2009. I WALKED into an event planning meeting. The personal victory was worth getting snarked at by my clients and colleages! ;) That day was the first day I had walked in over 3 weeks! Ok... it was more of a gimp than a walk, but I was crutch free!!!
• May 14, 2009. GIDDY... had decided to go back to the gym and just sit in the recumbent bike and try to move a little... I HAD LIVED through this, I wanted to feel alive and find me again... except when I got to the gym I found it had closed overnight and had been taken over by a different gym... enter a week of hardball and negotiations trying to recoup money lost... and some discouraging symptoms and setbacks w/ my leg. (extreme pain/swelling etc.)
• May 18, 2009. A chat w/ my surgeon was very discouraging. He told me I was crazy to try to work out and return to work so soon, but not harming myself as long as I kept it low impact and avoiding trauma. He told me to let my body tell me my limits but to lose the athelete's attitude of working through the pain, instead to listen to the pain/swelling on when to stop and slow down. He said there is nothing more they can do for me medically but to wait on the Coumadin therapy and hope my body dissolves the rest of the clots (I still have them knee to ankle). We will ultrasound again in another 5 months from now and see my status. He told me that due to permanent damage that I have a different body now, that I might never fully recover from the clots and not to even TRY to run for at least 6 months and not to count on my expectations of running my marathon, that I am no longer a runner. He was the 4th medical person in a week to tell me that. I am holding out on GOD to prove that one to me and then and only then will I accept it. In the meantime, I am shifting gears and taking up swimming for rehab, w/ my doctors blessing. He said that is a great and safe full body workout for me, and that I can also do upper body workouts as I feel able at the gym. PRAISE GOD I have options!!!