HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I am LOL'ing wondering how many are like me, starting a blog today or starting something new. What is it about the pretty box checking turn of the calendar that compells us to put ourselves out there or make some bold transformation?

I am also LOL'ing because I can't believe I am doing this. I am a VERY private person living a very public life in ways. I am married to a law enforcement officer and own and operate a successful company specializing in main event private security for some very public clients. Many of my friends and family are still scoffing at me and shaking their head in amusement for finally joining Facebook a couple of weeks ago after being an adament holdout forever.

I was lamenting to a good friend yesterday some New Year's revelations and commitments. In that process I mentioned that I wanted to make a daily focus on some areas and when I woke this morning - in my COFFEE DEPRIVED state I ended up here so I'm going to get over myself and go with it! Unlike many I am not starting something new, other than this blog. Like many I am reaffirming and trying to get a handle and a grasp on my focus and priorities. I have found myself losing sight of myself and needed a place to lay it all out, have accountability, and stop letting the things I hold most precious get lost in my chaos. I had no idea what to call this blog, so I just called the first things that came to mind as to what I am trying to improve on, understand, learn more about and grow in.

Loving
Raw
Running

None of these are NEW to me, except running. I began running in early October. It was a playful 'marriage dare' that got that started. I am still a complete novice but with high hopes and goals and a newfound passion... who knew how addictive running would turn out to be! Along with some very supportive friends and mentors, including my faboulous husband, I completed the Couch to 5K Running Program about a month ago. From there an idea was born to run a marathon for my 40th birthday! What a fantastic way to run towards health and celebrate the LIFE that God has blessed me with ... so in a conversation with my brother, who is a runner he found me my marathon that I am striving to run on 9/19/2010. My husband and I have put it on the calendar and have started a budget. My brother plans to run with me and even sent me a Maui Marathon hat to remind me to stay committed!

So, I haven't even ran my first official 5K outside of the gym, and I am training for a marathon. That is how I am wired though... I created my company on what could be called 'a dare' and it is thriving and I absolutely LOVE my work, my clients, my colleages and especially my staff... THEY ROCK! Eleanor Roosevelt once said 'You must do the things you think you cannot do.' I add to that .. THROUGH CHRIST WHO GIVES ME STRENGTH and really... what limits?

As far as LOVING... I need to start at the starting place. I have fallen short on my time with the Lord and it really shows in my life right now. I need to stop and rest in him and listen to what he has to say to me before I go off and running... both literally and figuratively! I also want to focus more on my husband and my marriage and my family. Hottie and I will celebrate 17 years of marriage in May, and I have learned, especially this past year that even good marriages take attention and work. We are in a time of growth and learning and I am so grateful for my strong, solid, faithful, hardworking man who loves the Lord and loves me and our daughters. I want to be the wife he needs and deserves in every way. ...then we enter the jungle.. you know the one... the pre-pubescent one! My 'Button' is 12 and my 'Lily' is 9, nearly 10. There aren't words to describe the experience of growing up with them! I am in complete awe seeing them emerge into the young ladies they will be and I am overcome by the incredible blessing and responsibility of being their mother. My hearts desire is to really BE the woman I want them to grow up to be, not just preach it ya know! They keep me laughing until I cry, and teach me humility and grace and compassion, and patience. I don't want to miss anything God would want me to share with them, experience with them, and learn with them during this short time of hands on parenting.

RAW... it's DETOX TIME... again. Boy do I need it. Disorganization, extreme schedules, depression, and stress, have caused me to eat way too much SAD food this past month and I can feel it. I am fasting today and will have a melon tonight. I will spend the next week detoxing all the SAD food that I have been eating and getting myself back on track. Outside of event planning meetings I don't have to work on site until late next week so this is a great time to do it.